My Not So Secret Diary

Welcome to my diary, for past months please use the navigation bar to the left.


ThinkingI don’t get much time to myself. That isn’t a complaint, it’s just the way things are, and I don’t mind, although of course, it is nice sometimes just to get a little bit of quiet.

The thing is… when it’s quiet I start to think, and when I think I start to remember.

The other morning for instance, I was driving home from the school run and it was a rare moment of quiet. I normally go to work from school, but not on a Friday. That’s the one day of the week where I come home to work on everything else I do. School is nearer to work, so I have a half an hour drive back across the moor. It’s beautiful and open and of course as I mentioned, quiet. Which I like, except my mind wanders.

While I know that our experiences shape us and make us the people we are, there are things I don’t want to remember and things I’d prefer not to worry about. Like anyone, I can’t change it. I can move forward, and that’s what I try to do most of the time. It would be so easy to drown out the things I’d rather not think about, but then, it wouldn’t get me anywhere, they’d still be there in the back of my mind. Once I might have thought wine would fix my worries, but I know now that it won’t. Even when it’s hard I face these things head on now, and I honestly think I’m better off for it.

It’s so easy to be hard on ourselves, but I’m trying not to be. I often try to remind myself that I wouldn’t talk to someone else the way I talk to myself, but it can be easier said than done. Just remember if you’re having a hard time, to be kind to yourself, things have a habit of working out for the best in the long run.

I hope you all have a lovely day.

Claire x

Book Reviews

book photoOkay, being honest, I love writing, but whenever I put anything out, whether it’s a blog post, an article or a book, I get nervous, so reading things like this post from the lovely @cat_on_a_leaf is just brilliant. Thank you so much! I’m glad you enjoyed it!

#Repost from @cat_on_a_leaf

Finished reading @soberme_claire’s new book last week and loved it! It’s very easy to read, nice short chapters, and offers a huge range of information that I wished I’d had in the early days. Here’s some of my fave chapters (and pics):
- ch 5 but I’m ok aren’t I? 100% identified with so much of that in my early days
-ch 7 challenges - this is a short one but so lovely to see some advice and acknowledgement of sober challenges.
- ch 9 what you eat is super important - this was really helpful! Sure some of it I knew, but magnesium eh? if I’d known that I might have given it a go specifically, being the anxious little ferret that I am!
- ch 14 - things that worked for me. I loved the honesty in this. Some things work and others don’t for all of us and that’s ok and it’s nice to see written in a page as a reminder. Claire once recommended that I try yoga and I’ve done it occasionally but I mostly put it on now to watch the dog in it whatever works for you is ok - go for it!

Bee Kind, Bee Brave, Bee Sober


Prevention Magazine

If you're in Australia, my story has been featured in this month's Prevention Magazine Australia - I'd love to hear what you think!Prevention

Be Kind

Be KindWhen I was drinking, very few people knew what a dark place I was in. Honestly, they didn’t know because I became pretty damn good at hiding it. I was ashamed, but also I knew that when I finally admitted it, I’d have to do something about it. That thought alone was terrifying, so instead I put my walls up and kept people at a distance. It was an awful way to live and no one knew how I felt because I didn’t trust anyone enough not to judge me. Letting people in was hard, but you know what? Largely they were all kind, and most didn’t judge. I found there were many, many other people out there like me and realising that helped me a lot!! Gradually the shame faded and I got better.So be kind. Who knows what goes on behind closed doors, or out of sight? We are all different and doing our best to make our way in the world. Just because someone looks okay, doesn’t mean they are and if you need help, reach out.

Maybe we're all a little bit like disco balls?

Disco BallWhat a beautiful way of looking at life. Here’s to the rest of you disco balls. We rock!


coachReposted from IPHM - We would like to introduce you to IPHM accredited therapist Claire Hatwell is a Senior Sober Coach with @beesober.cicAs a sober coach, I’m here to help you unlock your potential and succeed in your sober journey. I won’t tell you what to do, but I’ll help you work out the best way forward. My sessions are client led, and flexible. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but I’ll be there to listen when things are hard, and I promise one thing; I don’t judge! I understand that what’s right for one person, might not be for another.I’ve been sober since 8th September 2016. It was one of the scariest things I’ve ever done, but also the most rewarding. I suppose I’m saying I understand how you may be feeling because I’ve been there. It took me three proper attempts to succeed at getting sober, and now I’m here, living this life, there’s no way I’d go back! I’m the Bee Sober Ambassador for Cornwall which is fantastic! I love being a part of one of the greatest sober communities I’ve found. I also have DBS clearance, public liability insurance and am a member of IPHM.You don’t have to do this alone!Alongside a BA (Hons) in Childhood and Youth Studies, Claire has training in many holistic therapies, and decided to add Sober Coaching to her skill set. Having worked for many years with children at risk, she has experience working with a wide variety of children and their families."

Sober Inspiration

BooksThe week between Christmas and New Year can be a funny old time, especially at the moment, with the prospect of another set of Covid restrictions hanging over our heads. When we can't control what's going on in the world, we need to do what we can to help ourselves, and for me, that means maintaining my sobriety. Sometimes it feels like we're swimming against the tide, but in reality, we're the strong ones. Both my books are out now. The first is the story of my journey, while the second is a guide, so if you're embarking on a sober journey, or perhaps sober curious, this might be the place to start your new year. Just remember, every sober journey starts with just a moment. It all adds up.Take care of yourselves,Claire x