My Not So Secret Diary

Hospital Heist

Hospital Heist, Treliske, Claire and Barney Hatwell in Cornwall, Sober author and blogger Claire Hatwell
Yesterday we took part in a heist… breaking my mum/nanna out of her hospital ward and taking her to the hospital cafe for a change of scene. Don’t worry, we took her back again! It’s the little things, but this boy makes me smile.

Meanwhile, in Japan

Meanwhile in Japan, Sober author and blogger Claire Hatwell
Couldn’t believe it when I saw this in the news…

Leaving this here for you

Leaving This Here SoberMe Sayings by Sober author and blogger Claire Hatwell
I’m just going to leave this here… I’ll also let you into a secret. It’s completely true. Even on the hard days my sober life is so much better than it was with wine.
Stay strong!
You got this!
I believe in you

Results Day

Results Day 2Results Day
Results day! We needed treats! I am so proud of this young man - it’s been a bumpy old year, but he still got a distinction!

Swimming the worries away

10 mins swim in Rock Cornwall, wildswimming, Sober author and blogger Claire Hatwell
Took myself for a ten minute swim yesterday. It doesn’t fix everything in the world but it makes it all feel a little bit more manageable


Appearances, Sober author and blogger Claire Hatwell, in Rock Cornwall wild swimming
We put so much value on how someone looks, and I don’t mean appearance, I mean how they act and behave. I’d like to say I’m not judgemental, but I still make assumptions about how someone might be based on the way they are. For a long time no one would ever have imagined I had a drinking problem because I hid it so well behind my mask…
No one really knows whats going on for anyone else, even when we’re well meaning, we can get it wrong. We’re people after all. I assume other people don’t have faults, and imagine I’m the only one, but likewise, I forget sometimes that other people have worries too, often I’m so caught up in my own that I forget. Again, that doesn’t mean I’m bad, I’m just a person too.
We spend so much time being kind to other people, and thinking about them, don’t forget to be kind to yourselves too!

Brace Day

Brace Day, Claire Hatwell and Barn Hatwell in Portman Smile Clinic Truro. Sober author and blogger Claire Hatwell
Up and out early today as it’s the official removal of braces day for my son Barney!
He hates me taking selfies with him, so this is a rare one!


Perceptions, Claire Hatwell on the beach in Cornwall, Hatwell writer and author, sober blogger, My Not So Secret Recovery, My Not So Secret Guide to Recovery, sober author and blogger
I struggle with TV from time to time. I think my life is so full already that I don’t have the time or mental capacity for too much drama. I tend to prefer a bit of fantasy and escape from the real world; oh how I miss Game of Thrones! There’s the odd ‘normal’ thing I enjoy too, often a good hospital drama, but I’ll be honest, more and more it seems that TV programmes carry a message rather than just being there for entertainment. I’ve lost track of the amount of shows that have used an alcoholic parent as the reason behind every one of the main characters mistakes or poor choices and I’m a bit over it to be honest. While in no way am I suggesting it’s something you’d hope for, I don’t think we can condemn people as bad parents because they have an alcohol dependency. My kids have always been the centre of my world, and to suggest I was a bad parent due to my drinking really upsets me, because it’s not true. I am not and was never a bad person, just one who drank too much. Now, yes, I am a better version of myself, but I was never ‘bad’ and in my mind, these shows just reinforce all the worries ‘normal’ mums and dads like me feel about getting help. We don’t want to admit we’re struggling, so we keep the act up until one day when we can’t anymore. The other thing is the way recovery is often portrayed on TV as a few rough days and then back to normal. When my recovery didn’t look like that, I felt like I was doing something wrong. We shouldn’t feel like that because we’re all different. That’s one of the reasons I love the social media community so much, it doesn’t matter where we are, we can connect, no shame, no judgement, and those two things right there are two of the biggest healing tools I know.

Stick with it, one day at a time, and it will get easier.
Much love,


Beautiful Flowers Claire Hatwell sober author and blogger
A week later, and still looking beautiful!

In the Office

Work Buddy, mum Claire Hatwell and Stanley Hatwell at work in Launceston. Sober blogger, and author based in Cornwall
So the heatwave finally broke today, giving us torrential rain and thunder and lightning, but it gave me and my little work buddy something to watch out of the office window!


Rosettes, Sober Me gift shop on Etsy for recovery and sobriety, Claire Hatwell sober blogger and author
One of my most popular celebration rosettes, lots more available in my Etsy shop. Have you checked it out?


Yum Cawston Apple Can, Non Alcoholic Drinks, Sober Me, Sober Blogger, Claire Hatwell writer and author
Yum! Now this is worth a try. My husband popped to the shop last night and came back with some of these for me. It’s not too sweet, and really hits the spot!

Other People

Other People, Claire Hatwell, Sober writer and author, My Not So Secret Diary, My Not So Secret Recovery, My Not So Secret guide to recovering, Cornwall
I suppose I always imagined that when I finally stopped drinking other people would be proud and cheer me on. I expected them to understand what a challenge it was for me, and almost be in awe of this amazing thing I’d achieved. I was wrong, because unless you’ve had a problem with alcohol, how could you possibly understand this sort of addiction? Honestly, how could they understand when they didn’t go through recovery with me? I portrayed such a polished outward appearance, that no one other than those closest to me would even begin to understand what was going on in my mind. The two parts of myself were hard enough for me to reconcile, let alone for someone else.
There are situations even now, that I won’t put myself in. It’s not because I’m afraid I’ll drink again, because I’m not. It’s more that I don’t want to be surrounded by people that do. At times, we’re on separate paths, and that’s okay, it’s like, I wouldn’t go to a gym just to watch people work out, so why would I go to a pub to watch people drink? I’m realising more and more that I’m okay with that.
Before, when I was invited to something, I wouldn’t have been so honest, I would have tried to go, and either got grumpy or stressed out because it wasn’t where I wanted to be. I’m learning it’s okay, that I don’t need to be afraid of upsetting people, because my thoughts and feelings matter too. It’s my choice not to drink, a good one that I stand by, and if I want it to stick, then I have to defend it, and not be ashamed. So that’s what I’m doing. I can’t believe I’ll have been doing it for six years next month. There was a time when six days was impossible.
My advice is to just do you. It will get easier. It will be challenging too, and not everyone will understand, but unless they’ve walked in your shoes, we can’t expect them to. Trust me, those that matter will stay, and in the long run the journey will be so worthwhile.
Take care of yourselves x

In Need of Some Sober Inspiration?

Sober Inspiration, books by Claire Hatwell, author of My Not So Secret Recovery, My Not so secret guide to recovering and the road to recovery. Sober Blogger in Cornwall
Need some summer sober inspiration or a good book for the beach? Which of my books have you read?

All are available on Amazon, or for a signed copy, visit my Etsy page.

Behind the Scenes

Just a little bit of laser engraving, watch to the end to see the finished products.

@soberme_claire Packing up items to post out tomorrow. Check out my Etsy shop for more sober gifts and cards 💖 . #sober #soberlife #sobercurious #soberaf #soberliving #sobermum #sobermovement #soberlifestyle #sobernation #sobercommunity #sobertribe #soberjourney #soberthinking #sobermotivation #soberisbetter #sobriety #sobrietyjourney #sobrietyisbeautiful Stories - Lux-Inspira" href=""> Stories - Lux-Inspira