17 November. 2019 • Category: Running | Addiction | Mental Health | Mindfulness | Anxiety | Authenticity | Sobriety
Just finished my first half marathon!
This is me on 20th May 2019.
I’d just finished my first half marathon. I cried. While running. I cried so hard that I could barely breathe, but I couldn’t stop to catch my breath because I was afraid people would see. They wouldn’t understand. You see, I wasn’t crying because I was sad, I was crying because I was so happy. I gulped my breath and carried on, because I was running, and that was amazing. I had treated my body badly for so many years and it still let me run over 13 miles. I was so proud, and so pleased with myself. I still have days where it is hard, although I don’t want to drink anymore, sometimes I am still a little envious of people who get to relax with a glass of wine if you know what I mean? One glass was never enough for me though, and that’s my problem.
Eleven months before this photo was taken I’d started Couch to 5k, it was hideous! I really couldn’t run, but I heard it was good for anxiety and complemented Yoga so I gave it a go. There must be a real life ‘Running Bug’ because I think it bit me, I couldn’t stop, and gradually I was able to go further. 5k became 10k, 10 miles and then I booked my first half to train for. I never imagined that I would be the sort of person out in all weathers and enjoying it. I had no idea I would ever run as far as I have.
Completing my first half marathon changed things for me. I realised that it wasn’t only my addiction that defined me, and that I could instead now define myself as a runner. What an experience, and the best bit? If I can do it, I think anyone can. Plymouth was the first of four half marathons this year and I’m already booked for next year. My competitive side wants a better time than I got this year!
Thanks for reading! Happy running everyone!